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Types of Cookie Fortunes - Real Fortunes!

          Oh, they’re rare, but they’re out there. A real fortune tells you that something is going to happen to you (or for you, with you, or around you). It doesn’t give advice; it doesn’t editorialize. It just puts it out there, and leaves all the interpretation, preparation, and decision-making to the reader. 

          The best fortunes, of course, are those who are just vague enough to inspire wonder, but specific enough to be interesting. For example, “something good will happen to you” is too vague, and therefore uninteresting. “You’ll win the friggin’ lottery” is too specific, which is both less interesting (what’s to wonder about?) and less likely to happen (which risks eroding the reader’s fragile belief in the accuracy of confectionary predictions). Striking that balance is critical: “Unexpected wealth is coming your way.” It’s a start. And if you add “in bed” to the end of it, it passes the smirk test.

Can't find any real fortunes?  Neither can I.
So how about Making Your Own?